From f73dbadb871b48a35578c6f3abeab9358303fb25 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: pjanzen Date: Fri, 7 Apr 2000 04:45:03 +0000 Subject: [PATCH] Typos and punctuation; most from FreeBSD, one from NetBSD, and a couple bonus ones discovered while editing the file. --- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes | 24 ++++++------- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real | 46 ++++++++++++------------- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.sp.ok | 2 +- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes.sp.ok | 3 +- games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes2 | 2 +- 5 files changed, 38 insertions(+), 39 deletions(-) diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes index 293b338a2b9..492ce517bf2 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes @@ -4363,7 +4363,7 @@ So are they all, all cool cats, -- Come I to make this gig at Caesar's laying down. % Frisbeetarianism, n.: - The belief that when you die, your soul goes up the on roof and + The belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck. % Frobnicate, v.: @@ -5445,7 +5445,7 @@ How cheerfully he seems to grin, How neatly spreads his claws, And welcomes little fishes in, With gently smiling jaws! - -- Lewis Carrol, "Alice in Wonderland" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Alice in Wonderland" % How doth the VAX's C compiler Improve its object code. @@ -5782,7 +5782,7 @@ less." so many different things." "The question is," said Humpty Dumpty, "which is to be master-- that's all." - -- Lewis Carrol, "Through the Looking Glass" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass" % I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it. @@ -6033,7 +6033,7 @@ more simply -- `Never imagine yourself not to be otherwise than what it might appear to others that what you were or might have been was not otherwise than what you had been would have appeared to them to be otherwise.'" - -- Lewis Carrol, "Alice in Wonderland" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Alice in Wonderland" % I realize that the MX missile is none of our concern. I realize that the whole point of living in a democracy is that we pay professional @@ -6093,7 +6093,7 @@ I tried to turn the handle, But ... "Is that all?" asked Alice. "That is all." said Humpty Dumpty. "Goodbye." - -- Lewis Carrol, "Through the Looking Glass" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass" % I shot an arrow into the air, and it stuck. -- Graffito in Los Angeles @@ -7037,7 +7037,7 @@ Il brilgue: les t^oves libricilleux Se gyrent et frillant dans le guave, Enm^im'es sont les gougebosquex, Et le m^omerade horgrave. - -- Lewis Carrol, "Through the Looking Glass" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Through the Looking Glass" % Iles's Law: There is always an easier way to do it. When looking directly @@ -11659,7 +11659,7 @@ For he can thoroughly enjoy The pepper when he pleases! Wow! wow! wow! - -- Lewis Carrol, "Alice in Wonderland" + -- Lewis Carroll, "Alice in Wonderland" % Speak roughly to your little VAX, And boot it when it crashes; @@ -12490,7 +12490,7 @@ who have seen it, as one of the finest spectacles in nature. -- Benjamin Franklin. % The Great Bald Swamp Hedgehog: - The Gerat Bald Swamp Hedgehog of Billericay displays, in courtship, + The Great Bald Swamp Hedgehog of Billericay displays, in courtship, his single prickle and does impressions of Holiday Inn desk clerks. Since this means him standing motionless for enormous periods of time he is often eaten in full display by The Great Bald Swamp @@ -15743,7 +15743,7 @@ And yet you incessantly stand on your head -- "I feared it might injure the brain; But, now that I'm perfectly sure I have none, Why, I do it again and again." - -- Lewis Carrol + -- Lewis Carroll % "You are old," said the youth, "and I'm told by my peers That your lectures bore people to death. @@ -15764,7 +15764,7 @@ Yet you finished the goose, with the bones and the beak -- And argued each case with my wife; And the muscular strength which it gave to my jaw, Has lasted the rest of my life." - -- Lewis Carrol + -- Lewis Carroll % "You are old," said the youth, "and your programs don't run, And there isn't one language you like; @@ -15785,7 +15785,7 @@ Yet you turned a back-somersault in at the door -- "I kept all my limbs very supple By the use of this ointment -- one shilling the box -- Allow me to sell you a couple?" - -- Lewis Carrol + -- Lewis Carroll % "You are old," said the youth, "as I mentioned before, And make errors few people could bear; @@ -15806,7 +15806,7 @@ Yet you balanced an eel on the end of your nose -- Said his father. "Don't give yourself airs! Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff? Be off, or I'll kick you down stairs!" - -- Lewis Carrol + -- Lewis Carroll % You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. % diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real index 66f21982b16..4a280315479 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.real @@ -162,7 +162,7 @@ Corinthian, ionic, and doric. % An Army travels on her stomach. % -An egg has the shortest sex-life of all: if gets laid once; it gets +An egg has the shortest sex-life of all: it gets laid once; it gets eaten once. It also has to come in a box with 11 others, and the only person who will sit on its face is its mother. % @@ -394,7 +394,7 @@ Did you hear about the new German microwave oven? ... Seats 500. % -Did you know that Spiro Agnew is an anagram of "Grow a Penis" +Did you know that Spiro Agnew is an anagram of "Grow a Penis"? % Did you know that there are 71.9 acres of nipple tissue in the U.S.? % @@ -547,7 +547,7 @@ I knew that Santa would never lie. % "God is big, so don't fuck with him." % -God isn't dead -- he's been busted +God isn't dead -- he's been busted. % God isn't dead, He's just trying to avoid the draft. % @@ -566,7 +566,7 @@ still talking about it." % Good day for water sports. Take a bath with a friend. % -Grain grows best in shit +Grain grows best in shit. -- Ursula K. LeGuin % Gravity is an unforgiving motherfucker. @@ -635,7 +635,7 @@ Choir Invincible! HE'S FUCKING SNUFFED IT! Vis-a-vi his metabolic processes is head is lost. All statements concerning this parrot is no longer a going concern, after from now on, Inoperative... - THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!! + THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!" % Her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest in a yak. @@ -679,7 +679,7 @@ government, and more recently the heart and brain (the backbone was gone some time ago). All we seem to have left now is muscle. We'll be lucky to escape with our skins!" % -Howard Cosell's biggest protrusion is his asshole +Howard Cosell's biggest protrusion is his asshole. -- John Valby % Hugh Hefner is a virgin. @@ -690,7 +690,7 @@ I believe that Ronald Reagan will someday make this country what it once was ... an arctic wilderness -- Steve Martin % -I came; I saw; I fucked up +I came; I saw; I fucked up. % I have a funny daddy Who goes in and out with me @@ -710,7 +710,7 @@ In a long distance telephone booth. Of an ideal connection Even if somewhat uncouth. % -"I own my own body, but I share" +"I own my own body, but I share." % I realize that today you have a number of top female athletes such as Martina Navratilova who can run like deer and bench-press Chevrolet @@ -881,7 +881,7 @@ Incest, n.: Sibling revelry. % "Is it just me, or does anyone else read `bible humpers' every time -someone writes `bible thumpers?' +someone writes `bible thumpers?'" -- Joel M. Snyder, jms@mis.arizona.edu % It is a sad commentary on today's society that this fortune has to be @@ -1139,7 +1139,7 @@ People who develop the habit of thinking of themselves as world citizens are fulfilling the first requirement of sanity in our time. -- Norman Cousins % -Physicists do it with charm +Physicists do it with charm. % Politicians do it to everyone. % @@ -1158,7 +1158,7 @@ Q: How do you play religious roulette? A: You stand around in a circle and blaspheme and see who gets struck by lightning first. % -Q: How do you tell if an Elephant has been making love in your +Q: How do you tell if an elephant has been making love in your backyard? A: If all your trashcan liners are missing ... % @@ -1193,7 +1193,7 @@ Q: What is "SMOORPLAY"? A: It's what SMURFS do before they SMUCK, of course! % Q: What is the worst story Helen Keller ever read? -A: A cheese grater +A: A cheese grater. % Q: What's Jewish foreplay? A: Two hours of begging. @@ -1222,7 +1222,7 @@ for farting at a friend. -- Mrs. Byrne's Dictionary of Unusual, Obscure & Preposterous Words % -Reagan can't _a_c_t either +Reagan can't _a_c_t, either. % Remember when you were a kid and the boys didn't like the girls? Only sissies liked girls? What I'm trying to tell you is that nothing's @@ -1263,7 +1263,7 @@ Said a horny young girl from Milpitas, "My favorite sport is coitus." But a fullback from State Made her period late, -And now she has athlete's fetus +And now she has athlete's fetus. % Said a swinging young chick named Lyth Whose virtue was largely a myth, @@ -1449,7 +1449,7 @@ and I can wash it as fast as I want!" The Split-Atom Blues Gimme Twinkies, gimme wine, - Gimme jeans by Calvin Kline ... + Gimme jeans by Calvin Klein ... But if you split those atoms fine, Mama keep 'em off those genes of mine! @@ -1471,7 +1471,7 @@ its own experience belies. Of course, even two blind men can do enormous damage to each other, not to speak of the room. -- Henry Kissinger % -The United States Army; +The United States Army: 194 years of proud service, unhampered by progress. % @@ -1524,7 +1524,7 @@ oppressive. They are revolutions against feudalism. [1952] % There are two sides to every divorce: yours and the shithead's. % -"There is a God, but He drinks" +"There is a God, but He drinks." -- Blore % There once was a couple named Kelley, @@ -1533,7 +1533,7 @@ Who lived their life belly to belly. They used Library Paste, Instead of Petroleum Jelly. % -There once was a fiesty young terrier +There once was a feisty young terrier Who liked to bite girls on the derriere. He'd yip and he'd yap, Then leap up and snap; @@ -1543,7 +1543,7 @@ There once was a freshman named Lin, Whose tool was as thin as a pin, A virgin named Joan From a bible belt home, -Said "This won't be much of a sin." +Said, "This won't be much of a sin." % There once was a hacker named Ken Who inherited truckloads of Yen @@ -1631,7 +1631,7 @@ There was a young lad name of Durcan Who was always jerkin' his gherkin. His father said, "Durcan! Stop jerkin' your gherkin! -Your gherkin's for ferkin', not jerkin'. +Your gherkin's for ferkin', not jerkin'." % There was a young lady from Maine Who claimed she had men on her brain. @@ -1660,7 +1660,7 @@ Who said she thought fucking a bliss, There was a young lady of Norway Who hung by her toes in a doorway. She said to her beau - "Just look at me Joe + "Just look at me, Joe I think I've discovered one more way." % There was a young man from Bel-Aire @@ -1687,7 +1687,7 @@ Who wanted to bugger the swans. Said, "Pray take my daughter! Those birds are reserved for the dons." % -There was a young whore from kaloo +There was a young whore from Kaloo Who filled her vagina with glue. She said with a grin, "If they pay to get in, @@ -1701,7 +1701,7 @@ Whose prick was remarkably short. % There was an old pirate named Bates Who was learning to rhumba on skates. - He fell on his cutlass + He fell on his cutlass, Which rendered him nutless And practically useless on dates. % diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.sp.ok b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.sp.ok index 879bbb84f70..acef3e36e20 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.sp.ok +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes-o.sp.ok @@ -203,9 +203,9 @@ excrement eyeing farting feces +feisty ferkin fetcheth -fiesty findeth flunkers frat diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes.sp.ok b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes.sp.ok index c8d49705a2b..d2faa683bc0 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes.sp.ok +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes.sp.ok @@ -194,7 +194,7 @@ Carmel Carotene Carotene's Carperpetuation -Carrol +Carroll Cary Casablanca Caspar @@ -448,7 +448,6 @@ Gaultier Gauvreay Geis Genderplex -Gerat Gerrold's Ghandi Ghostbusters diff --git a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes2 b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes2 index e7041036b8d..004569cd7c7 100644 --- a/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes2 +++ b/games/fortune/datfiles/fortunes2 @@ -46430,7 +46430,7 @@ next minute our brains have us married with kids, the following minute we see him having an extramarital affair. By the time someone says "I'd like you to meet Cecil," we shout, "You're late again with the child support!" -- Cynthia Heimel, "A Girl's Guide to Chaos" -%% +% I don't have any use for bodyguards, but I do have a specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants. -- Elvis Presley -- 2.20.1